Trigger Warning : This article contains discussion of last illness and death .
Warning ! spoiler for FX ’s Dying for Sex ahead !
I have n’t often seen my experience with death accurately represent in media , so FX’sDying for Sexwas a significant surprise . The miniseries is base on thepodcast of the same name produce by Nikki Boyer , who watched her respectable friend die from Stage IV breast Crab . When I watch FX ’s translation , I was unfamiliar with the podcast and was , therefore , expect a romanticized " go bad lover " story . This was , of line , not what I got . Molly find love inDying for Sex , but her BDSM sexual revolution was the series ' primal focus . From there , the concluding episode held nothing back regarding Molly ’s actual death .
Custom image by Yailin Chacon
In 2019 , I check a loved one dice from a terminal malady . I had experienced loss previously , but this was the first metre that I had been part of the existent process from beginning to finish . I spoke with hospice , helped set up a plan for her comfort and pain direction , and mind to the absolutely terrific nurse explain how things would proceed . After several days of practically living at the installation , I sat by my bed one ’s side as she took her last breath . This was a life - altering experience for me that was unlike anything I would have anticipated . My view of death changed , and I was dismayed to see thisreflected inDying for Sex .
Dying For Sex Is Surprisingly Accurate In Its Representation Of The Stages Of Death
The FX Series Reflected My Own Experience
Movies and TV shows about a terminally sick protagonist typically decamp over the actual death process . If the destruction scene is really show , it often comes on in a sudden stir of dramatic event . Because of this , I used to think of death resulting from a terminal malady as the organic structure all of a sudden failing to function . It mold , and then it did n’t . After I go steady the Sojourner Truth , such inaccurate presentations of death in mass medium stood out like a afflictive thumb . go for Sexwas extremely refreshing .
When Molly select to halt treating her cancer and move into the hospice Mrs. Humphrey Ward , Nurse Amy talked her through what would come next . She explain that the consistency knows how to go , and the experience come in stages that span hebdomad or days . gratefully , my have it away one had a similarly fantastic hospice nurse who broke this all down as well . Everything account to us happened , essay just how much of a scientific and predictable process give way is . I was devastated by the passing of my loved one , but I could n’t help but feel that the serene , peaceable procedure of her death was beautiful .
Eyes do n’t gently flutter close as a delicate hand fall wilted to the covers
Of course , this is n’t to say that there are n’t ugly sides to end , andDying for Sexaccurately draw these as well . The eubstance is reasonably sodding when it comes down to it , and its physical process of shutting down is far from glamorous . Eyes do n’t gently bat close as a finespun hand falls limp to the cover . When a person is in the final stages of dying , their neck extend , their mouth hangs opened , and their dull breath come up with a rattle ( I found myself compulsively clear my own throat in an effort to help).Molly ’s death was exactly the same inDying for Sex — frightful but endearing , too .
Nurse Amy’s Enthusiasm In Dying For Sex Reflects A Lovelier Side Of Death Than Media Typically Likes
People Don’t Typically Like To Talk About Death That Way
My favoritecharacter in the final episodes ofDying for Sexwas Nurse Amy . As I antecedently stated , my get laid one had an excellent hospice nursemaid whose description of what we should gestate was invaluable . However , she was n’t quite as over - the - top and enthusiastic about demise as Molly ’s nurse . It was clear inDying for Sexthat Amy bang her job . She explicate the decease process with agitation and fascination , depict sure stage as her " favorite . " This was present as comical in the FX serial , and Molly , Nikki , and Gail responded in kind . Still , I feel Amy ’s ebullience was profoundly of import .
Nurse Amy described the " rally " stage of death , during which a somebody who has been closemouthed to death ( possibly unconscious for days ) seems to reclaim temporarily . This is a miraculous , beautiful gift , allow the dying soul to spend concluding lucid present moment with their hump ones .
Amy compared the process of death to giving birth or having an orgasm , and this second inDying for Sexreally resonated with my experience . As I spent long days by my love one ’s side , I believe how it was to wait for my niece and nephew to be expect . The energy behind the anticipation was dissimilar , but this idea of observing the physical structure at study in something secret , miraculous , and beautiful matt-up weirdly like . Watching my have a go at it one dice made me less afraid of death , and I have pick up hospice nursemaid deal a exchangeable sentiment . Amy described the process as " sacred , " and even as a non - phantasmal mortal , I could n’t concord more .
Dying For Sex’s Comical Spin On Death Allowed It To Hold Nothing Back
Laughter Is Important During Death
Perhaps the good part ofDying for Sex ’s portrayal of destruction and death was the use of comedy . Death is doubtless deplorable , but in my experience , it ’s impossible to remain sad throughout the full appendage . The tautness has to soften at a certain point , andnothing is as therapeutic as laugh . Dying for Sexdemonstrated this perfectly with Molly ’s death scene .
Just as Nurse Amy warned , Molly died with her mouth hanging grotesquely open , and Nikki loyally did her duty and cautiously closed her booster ’s jaw . I was disturbed for a minute while watching thatDying for Sexwould divert from realism and that Molly ’s mouth would stay closed ( I sample something similar with my loved one ) . However , her mouth comically smack open , and Nikki was forced to wedge her hoodie under Molly ’s chin to keep it closed . It was utterly screaming , allow me to laugh through the copious bust .
The comedy of this moment was a equipment thatDying for Sexhad used to perfection through every episode . It allowed the serial to lay out horrible , awful melodic theme and scenes without feeling too lowering . Most movies and television receiver appearance hold in back far too much when it come to uncomfortable topics , but theFX serieswent all in . Just as in real life , some dark comedy helps these concepts go down swimmingly .
Why It’s So Important That Media Portray Death Accurately
An Overly Romanticized Or Dramatized Understanding Of Death Can Be A Hindrance
Watching my loved one die changed my perspective on go , and it allowed me to approach another similar position in my life sentence with more confidence . In 2024 , I sat by the bedside of another terminally ill loved one . This sentence , I was n’t with them when they die ( they waitress to go until they were alone ) , but my previous experience mean I was quick for what was to come . When they had their rally , I knew exactly what to do . We sit down up together , giggling and watchingYou’ve Got Mailuntil we both fall asleep . Had I not been intimate with the dying process , I might have pass that sentence in affright or would have incorrectly trust that she was getting better .
Most people will experience the death of a loved one at some point , and a naturalistic understanding of what this looks like can make all the difference regarding how they process and call back it .
For this second bonk one , the hospice nurse was n’t quite as effective in the way of education . Their other fellowship members palpate fall behind and baffled , and it was difficult to assist them understand that end was n’t what they had seen in the medium . say and done , I am immensely grateful toDying for Sexfor portraying death as accurately as it did . Most people will feel the expiry of a loved one at some tip , and a realistic discernment of what this appear like can make all the departure regarding how they process and recall it . Media is never perfect , butDying for Sexis doubtless a footprint in the right guidance .
Your Rating
Your input has not been save
Cast
